Before performing a baptism, the priest approaches the young redneck father and says solemnly, "Baptism is a serious step. Are you prepared for it?"

"I think so," the man replies. "My wife made up a batch o' appetizers and we git a caterer comin' to provide plenty o' cookies and cakes for all the guests and kin."

"I don't mean that," the priest responds. "I mean, are you prepared spiritually?"

"Oh, sure," says the redneck. "I've got us a whole keg o' beer and a case o' whiskey."